The Future of Fighting Blog

Cheetos-imbibing, socially stunted television viewers are going to have some tough choices come Saturday night — and Domino’s over Pizza Hut isn’t one of them.

On Animal Planet, a cable station that succeeds in its meticulous editing to make creatures maximally cute without seemingly ever having to defecate, we have “Animal Cops: Houston,” wherein one presumes the debate over rabbits being pets or meat will continue.

American Movie Classics, meanwhile, will resume living down its reputation by offering an 8 p.m. screening of “My Cousin Vinny”; Univision will be airing something called “Sabado Gigante,” which listings summarize as featuring “concurso de baile de ninos”; A&E has the requisite repeat of “Die Hard,” complete with basic cable’s dubbing of Bruce Willis’ signature line to “Yippee kai yay, melon farmer.”

Sports fan? There’s the first stage of the Tour de France on Versus, where French officials will demand American cyclists pee in a cup every half-mile. NBC has the U.S. Olympic Swimming Trials; ESPN has poker, possibly the only spectator sport more boring than a staring contest.

Oh, and there’s the Ultimate Fighting Championship, headlined by Forrest Griffin (Pictures) and Quinton Jackson (Pictures).

Almost forgot.

Not an indefensible slight, though. Despite 13 weeks of basic cable preamble — with champion Jackson and challenger Griffin acting as coaches on the umpteenth season of “The Ultimate Fighter” — there’s been little palpable anticipation for Jackson’s first title defense in nearly a year.

Maybe the former has a lot to do with the latter. Despite his thunder-stealing performance against Chuck Liddell (Pictures) in May 2007, Jackson has yet to resonate with UFC audiences the way most expected. It’s surprising, given that Jackson’s style is aggressive and he’s got enough charisma to sustain a career in pro wrestling. Plenty of fighters can boast of one or the other, but few can claim both.

In the box office arena, Jackson is a true mixed-style attraction. Problem is, he’s producing only mixed results.

Part of the issue might be the lack of continuity. In a sport where top-tier athletes can comfortably fight three times in a calendar year, Jackson was shelved for 10 months following his decision win over Dan Henderson (Pictures) in September so he and Griffin could construct a tenuous rivalry on Spike. (Genial as both men are, the tension consisted primarily of who was going to win a water-gun fight.)

The series did one thing right: Jackson’s persona came across, and his faux-street hustler style probably endeared him to viewers looking for more in their fight athletes than tribal tattoos and monosyllabic interviews. Pairing him with Griffin — so beloved by fans he’s essentially MMA’s version of a Border Collie — seemed like a slam-dunk proposition.

Instead, it’s looking more like an air ball.

Devoid of any emotional fireworks, fights with mass appeal have to be seen as competitive. Griffin, while a dogged and almost incomprehensibly tough human being, may be perceived as outclassed against Jackson, a more obscure talent casual fans can still meter thanks to his KO over Liddell.

At 2-2 coming into the fight with Mauricio “Shogun” Rua, Griffin seemed on the precipice of high-profile mediocrity. Then he pummeled Rua in an outstanding performance, the Brazilian’s advantages on paper getting shredded in the cage. It was a warm-fuzzies moment for Griffin’s fans, who had long wanted to marry his likeability with a substantial win.

But Griffin’s victory came the same month as Jackson’s first title defense, meaning that both men have sat out the majority of the last year. Any impressions made that September, any stories built, have been dulled by the proceeding 10 months.

There’s merit to the concept of delayed gratification, but this is a little much.

Stranger still is an auspicious lack of promotion for Jackson, who has easily earned an hour’s worth of highlights in his Pride career. Why not package a propaganda piece prior to the show that elaborates on his impressive history? Wasn’t that more or less the point of acquiring that video library?

I like both Jackson and Griffin. It certainly won’t be a boring fight, and it’s not overly offensive from a purist’s rankings-first perspective. But the meeting doesn’t get my blood boiling in the same way a Jackson vs. Wanderlei Silva (Pictures) rematch would, or even Griffin’s hardnosed style standing opposite a waning Liddell.

That might be a lineup worthy of a 10-month wait. As it is — especially paired with a moribund undercard — you might be tempted to spare yourself the $44.95 and settle in for “Chain Gang Girls” on the Oxygen network instead.

Check your local listings.

Josh Thomson (Pictures) hears the questions about his health and senses the doubt revolving around whether his body can withstand a potential five-round battle with Strikeforce lightweight champion Gilbert Melendez (Pictures). Truth be told, he has his own reservations.

Five months removed from shoulder surgery, Thomson will meet Melendez in the main event at Strikeforce’s show this Friday at the HP Pavilion in San Jose, Calif. Even he questions the wisdom behind the matchup, which will pair the promotion’s top 155-pound fighters for the first time.

“I was really hoping to avoid a fight with Gilbert my first fight back,” Thomson says. “Promotions make fights, and fighters have to step up to take them. After eight or nine months off, I’ve got some catching up to do. It would have been nice to get a warm-up fight in.”

Sixteen fights into his professional mixed martial arts career, Thomson (14-2) has begun to show signs of the wear and tear associated with spending nearly a decade in the sport. Punches, kicks and slams all have taken their toll. The 29-year-old underwent surgery to repair a torn labrum on Jan. 13, as doctors “scoped” his shoulder and left behind four quarter-inch-long scars that mark their work.

“They might as well have cut me open,” Thomson says. “It’s still not 100 percent. I don’t know that I’ll ever be 100 percent, but I’ve done as much as I could to get there.”

He endures exhausting rehabilitation on the shoulder twice a day every day, as he attempts to work the joint back into shape through electric stimulation, weight lifting and various strength and range-of-motion exercises.

“It sucks,” Thomson says. “I’m still going through it.”

All this comes in addition to the normal four to six hours he spends training at the American Kickboxing Academy on a daily basis. The injury has forced him to deal with the limited shelf life of most mixed martial artists.

“It gave me flashbacks,” Thomson says. “I had a lot of injuries early in my career. I’ve been fighting for 10 years. I started thinking, ‘Is this just one injury that’s going to lead to the next? Is this it for me?’”

Universally received as one of the world’s top-10 lightweights, Melendez (14-1) presents a myriad of challenges for Thomson. The 26-year-old Cesar Gracie (Pictures) disciple brings to the cage a toxic blend of strength, stamina and athleticism and holds high-profile victories over Rumina Sato (Pictures), Hiroyuki Takaya (Pictures), Clay Guida (Pictures) and Dream lightweight grand prix semifinalist Tatsuya Kawajiri (Pictures).

“He brings everything to the table,” Thomson says. “He’s got a big right hand, good wrestling and good ground-and-pound. He’s a good athlete and a good person. He doesn’t talk all that s— other fighters talk, but if you make one mistake, he’ll capitalize on it.”

Thomson’s longtime trainer, Bob Cook, admits to concern over his fighter’s lengthy layoff and with how his surgically repaired shoulder will respond to the pace Melendez promises to push. Thompson has not competed since he stopped Adam Lynn (Pictures) on first-round strikes at the Playboy Mansion in September.

“That’s not favorable,” Cook says. “Ideally, you want to keep a fighter fighting every three months so no ring rust develops and they’re used to being in the mix. But this is a big fight they’ve both wanted to do for a while. He’s wanted another crack at that title for a long time.”

Thomson, a man who has not been defeated in more than two years, thinks the pressure rests solely on Melendez’s shoulders.

“To me, it’s just another fight,” he says. “I don’t think I’ve been calmer for any fight in my career. I just woke up one day and thought, ‘Why am I stressing out? All the pressure’s on him.’ He’s got the title. People are expecting him to beat me. If things aren’t going well for him by the end of the first or second round, he’s going to start doubting himself.”

Thomson, who turns 30 in September, will carry a six-fight winning streak into the match with Melendez. He has dotted his resume with quality victories, from decision wins against former World Extreme Cagefighting lightweight titleholders “Razor” Rob McCullough (Pictures) and Hermes Franca (Pictures) to his submission win over decorated muay Thai practitioner Duane Ludwig (Pictures). Only Yves Edwards (Pictures) has been able to finish him, having done so with a head kick that still makes the rounds on UFC highlight reels.

Win or lose, Thomson feels at peace with what he has achieved since he made his professional debut back in 2001.

“I’ve pretty much accomplished everything I wanted to,” Thomson says. “I’ve been able to make a living at something I enjoy. I don’t need a gold belt strapped around my waist. I’m someone who’s fine with leaving the sport at any time.”

If another season of “Dexter” isn’t enough to get you to shell out a few extra bucks a month for Showtime, this Saturday night should deliver the most eloquent argument possible. What is classier than sitting back, putting on some Mozart and watching a bunch of dudes fight? This is why television exists, people.

Your friends at EliteXC deliver the fistic mayhem with enough next-generation talent to keep the whippersnappers happy while giving all us old kooks just enough nostalgia to keep us from switching to a rerun of “The Golden Girls.”

So read up or, better yet, read left to right. I find that works best.

Yves Edwards (Pictures) vs. KJ Noons

After years as an uncrowned lightweight king, veteran face-smasher Yves Edwards (Pictures) will look to become EliteXC’s monarch at the expense of one of MMA’s most carefully groomed prospects: Karl James Noons (Pictures).

Known to fans as KJ, there was a time when Noons (6-2) seemed unworthy of sharing the same nickname as baller extraordinaire Kevin Johnson. Of course, much of that had to do with the ongoing Pride audition curse, which paralyzed the careers of several prospects. Years floundering on the sidelines quickly ended when Gary Shaw decided Noons would be the man to rule the EliteXC lightweight division. A good idea on paper that was run through the shredder by an atomic KO punch courtesy of everyone’s favorite felon, Charles “Krazy Horse” Bennett.

Impressive rebound wins over Edson Berto and Nick Diaz (Pictures) have Noons back in the spotlight and sporting the EliteXC lightweight title. However, that is no guarantee of ongoing greatness considering the task that awaits him.

Normally, the sight of a guy sporting spandex shorts with a smiley face on the crotch doesn’t inspire much fear in the hearts of men unless you’re that guy who had a seizure the first time you walked into a locker room. Yves Edwards (Pictures) (34-13-1) may wear the smiley shorts, but he has ruined enough smiles to pay for many dentists’ mortgages.

While he is coming off a rough stretch that saw him lose five of six bouts, Edwards has found new life under the EliteXC banner. His stunning flying knee knockout against Berto had many an old-school fan remembering ye olden days of Sir Edwards perpetrating grievous injury on many a soul.

Grievous injury awaits someone come Saturday night since neither Noons or Edwards is likely to pass on the opportunity to match wits and fists with a willing opponent. The only question is if Noons is the striker that EliteXC advertises him to be or if that bout with “Krazy Horse” revealed that he doesn’t have the jaw to play in the deep end of the pool. Considering Edwards’ combination of technical acumen and cranium-crunching power, it’s hard to like Noons’ chances here especially since he’d be hard pressed surviving any entanglements with Edwards on the ground.

The deck is stacked against Noons, and he lacks the crazy magician eyes of David Blaine to make up the difference. Edwards takes home the EliteXC lightweight title with a second-round knockout.

Hard to say who will walk away from this bout with a bigger headache, Noons or Shaw.

Nick Diaz (Pictures) vs. Muhsin Corbbrey (Pictures)

The ongoing soap opera that is Nick Diaz (Pictures)’s MMA career will get another episode to add to the archives when he takes on the relatively unknown but more than capable Muhsin Corbbrey (Pictures).

Sporting the sort of tattoos you’d expect from a Gilbert Yvel (Pictures) fan boy, Corbbrey lacks the mad Dutchman’s temper but more than makes up the difference with a well-rounded style highlighted by the kind of ground wizardry that every Dutch kickboxer only dreams about.

The Harry Potter of the mat routine has served Corbbrey well in his brief EliteXC tenure, helping him notch a pair of wins. An even bigger achievement could be waiting for Corbbrey however, assuming he can get past MMA’s answer to Nick Nolte.

Known as much for his excess of talent as his surrealist rants, Nick Diaz (Pictures) (16-7, 1 NC) has made himself into an enigma that would drive The Riddler insane. The only concern is if all that eccentricity is starting to affect a fighter who once appeared destined for greatness in the welterweight division. Razor-thin loss after razor-thin loss put those dreams to an end, and Diaz’s run as a pseudo-lightweight hasn’t gone much better.

An epic win over Takanori Gomi (Pictures) was overturned thanks to his dalliance with the lovely Miss M and his supposed EliteXC coronation was ruined by Noons. Brought in to be a star attraction for MMA’s fastest growing promotion, Diaz might end up turning into a gatekeeper if he doesn’t start paying as much attention to his fights as his ongoing critiques of not-so-pure reason.

Even if Diaz shows up in full-blown Tyler Durden mode, Corbbrey’s weak takedowns and preference for working off his back won’t serve him well against Diaz, who has the kind of jiu-jitsu to shut down Corbbrey’s offense while coming in over the top with his underrated ground-and-pound.

Overall, not a good matchup for Corbbrey, who doesn’t pose much of a threat to Diaz on the feet and will be lucky to get any offense going on the ground.

This one comes to a merciful end after two rounds of Diaz bringing the pain like Method Man … *insert obvious connecting joke here*

Murilo Rua (Pictures) vs. Tony Bonello (Pictures)

No MMA fan can deny stumbling across Tony Bonello (Pictures)’s Fight Finder page and wondering why in the world a guy who racks up seemingly easy submission wins at a Ruthian pace is stuck slumming in local shows.

The same questions surround the puzzling downward spiral of a fighter who was once one of MMA’s most promising prospects: Murilo “Ninja” Rua. Rua was supposed to be next in line after Wanderlei Silva (Pictures) as the standard-bearer for the always sadistic Chute Boxe camp.

Unfortunately, Rua (15-8-1) ended up being Silva’s personal bodyguard in Pride and was thrown to the wolves before his technique could catch up to his talent. While he still shows flashes of that talent, you have to wonder if Rua will ever recover from the lopsided matchmaking he endured in his early days.

Not something Bonello (16-0-1, 1 NC) has ever had to deal with, as most of his competition has been overmatched local fighters with little clue about the spot’s intricacies. Then again, it is awfully hard to score a rear-naked choke in less than 45 seconds, and the ease with which Bonello has notched many of his wins has led to whispers about whether or not “The Gun” is simply adding glossy entries to his resume.

We know that Bonello can slap on a heel hook, but that isn’t getting the job done at this level and he will be tested by Rua’s well-rounded skills and savvy, something that Bonello either lacks or has never shown.

The myth of Tony Bonello (Pictures) takes a hit when Rua picks him apart on the feet before giving “The Gun” a taste of his own medicine, a one-sided submission loss. I’ve been wrong before, but if it happens with this one, I can’t wait to read the conspiracy theories that are sure to follow.

Ron Waterman (Pictures) vs. Dave Herman (Pictures)

Because no card is complete without the prerequisite heavyweight tussle, EliteXC and Co. deliver us the ultimate Jesus power of Ron Waterman (Pictures) taking on the decidedly less dei-rific Dave Herman (Pictures).

Maybe they can raise the stakes and let the winner keep the “man” suffix?

Either way, interest should be high in this one, considering Herman (10-0) comes in with a shiny record. He is coming off an impressive dismantling of the much-hyped Mario Rinaldi (Pictures) and may be EliteXC’s next big thing in the heavyweight division. The idea of a heavyweight prospect making good would be a welcome relief for any MMA fan.

A solid challenge awaits the youngster in Ron Waterman (Pictures) (15-5-2), who has been on the heavyweight MMA scene as far back as anyone can remember and always seems to have been the kind of fighter custom-built for derailing prospects. With strong wrestling and suffocating top control, Waterman has the style to give green fighters fits, but he also seems to fall apart against opponents who can answer back with offense of their own.

It is a potential problem in the making since Herman isn’t shy about taking the fight to his opponents — which could either be what wins or costs him the fight. Coming out like a Meatloaf-inspired bat out of hell will only get you stuck underneath Waterman, but standing idly by is likely to end the same way.

I’ll go out on a limb here and say that Herman has the game to find a way against Waterman, more than likely by taking advantage of “H20″ on the feet where he flows more like WD-40 than water.

Rafael Feijao vs. Wayne Cole (Pictures)

The other heavyweight throw down awaiting Showtime subscribers features another blue-chip heavyweight prospect, Rafael Feijao, putting his press clippings on the line against the always exciting — if not successful — Wayne Cole (Pictures).

It is an interesting bout for Feijao (5-1), who saw his hype take a hit in the IFL, where, after an impressive drubbing of Devin Cole (Pictures), he lost a bizarre match with one-time UFC prospect and BJJ-ubermensch Marcio “Pe de Pano” Cruz.

Seemingly down on the scorecards entering the third round, Feijao was disqualified for throwing an illegal upkick after having been warned several times about the IFL’s relatively simple rulebook.

We’ve seen plenty of “Million-dollar-talent, five-cent-brain” situations go down in MMA, and Feijao has some work ahead of him to erase the memory of his Wes Sims (Pictures) moment.

While no one is going to tab grand expectations on Wayne Cole (Pictures) (11-6), that is often the ultimate liberator in a sport where the pressure of living up to the hype has buckled the knees and minds of many a fighter.

A return to form awaits Feijao, who picks apart Cole on the feet before getting him down to the mat and scoring a relatively uneventful submission win.

Tragic considering MMA really needs someone to run with the whole “rule-breaker angle.” I refuse to believe the sport has made any progress until we find our Ric Flair, and why not have our “Nature Boy” be a huge Brazilian dude?